Birthday Eve...

tomorrow is the big ONE. I am taking the day off to spend with my little girl. Planning a nice breakfast, possibly a movie, and too many pictures to look at in the years to come. I'm not sure where the last year went but it seems that we were just bringing her home from the hospital.. such a little thing she was. Now here she is taking small steps and saying new words, always ready to dance and usually has that beautiful smile on her face. Knowing that she is our baby, and seeing how quickly the boys have grown, makes me appreciate every little moment of her baby-ness that much more.. and now we are entering the toddler stage. As I look back it seems that Kole was just this age.. and Logan too.. this next week is going to bring big changes in our house.. not only is Scout turning one, Logan will be 7.. (7 already??? I swear he just turned one himself!)and we start a new school year. Kole is going into the Middle School, that fact alone fills me with apprehension. Not only because he is growing up, not so much a little kid anymore, he is a tween, a young man.. I miss the days of him playing non stop with his hot wheels, and the way he loved to paint with me. I worry so much, not only about the choices he is going to have to make, but did I do enough and teach him enough to make sure that he makes the right ones? Logan will be there soon enough too, a first grader, his big brother isn't going to be there to say hi too in the hallways, he loved that last year. He was always one to run up and give Kole a hug in the hallways. I guess it's time for Logan to be his own person, maybe have some time to shine on his own and not fall into Kole's shadow. Makes me a bit sad.. last year was the only year my kids will ever go to the same school at the same time. Can you tell I am full of emotions tonight?? SO much has changed in the last year, some for the better, some for the worse.. or it could just depend on how you look at it. Regardless there is no time machine to go back and revisit the past, so when you see me and my camera just know that I'm capturing the memories that will last me a lifetime, to catch the kids being kids, smiling, goofing, and turning one.. and seven.. and twelve.. and to look back at in the future when they go off to college, get married, or have their own little ones celebrating milestones.. to make me smile and maybe send myself back in time even if it's just for a few moments...